Spent

"If you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday." -Isaiah 58:10

This scripture is running though my head recently.  It is a verse that I love but I have particularly been feeling SPENT these last few days.  And it's a specific 'spent-ness.'  It's a spentness because of our life of loving Ntokozo, someone who is certainly broken and oppressed.  I just hit a wall and have gotten really overwhelmed by it all, and the millions of steps that are still ahead of us for her healing.  This is a young girl, teen mom, orphan, victim of sexual, physical, and emotional abuse, and now living with crazy white people.  Yeah, if she didn't already have an identity crisis...  I kid, but seriously, I think 'we' think that you put a broken person in a loving family, just take in a cute foster kid, and 'magic' they are fixed.  Oh white people, how naive and full of ego we really are.  Seriously though, we have found ourselves in such a mess, and there is NOTHING we can do except wait for God to do a miracle and heal her.  It just all hit me yesterday, and thankfully we were at Hillsong and so I had so much time and space to cry it out before God.  And in even more divine favor, the sermon by Phil Dooley was about 'Vision' and keeping hold of our vision even when negativity tries to take us off track.  Over the weekend I went into a bit of a pity party about how hard this is, and God really got me back on track.  This is HIS story, this is HIS vision, and He is going to work things out how HE wants to.  We know this, maybe sometimes you need a good reminder of it.  Nonetheless, we are definitely praying for some major breakthroughs with Ntokozo, that she would trust us and allow us to love  on her.  It WILL happen.  We will see Him work.  Where are the places in YOUR life where vision is getting you off track?  If it's GOD's vision and dream, it WILL happen.  


Love,
Sarah